That Glorious Feeling

I'm going to bring Amin along for my Convocation Day on the 16th, next week. Though I'm excited for it, I'm actually very nervous because I don't know how Amin could fit in. I've only exposed little things about him to my family and now he's truly introducing himself to my parents.

It has been about 7 months in Terengganu. Time flies so fast, things have accelerated so fast. I've learned so many things, I've felt so many emotions inside of me that I don't really keep up with time. I hardly have any time to write down what I've learned in a day, thus the lack of blogging.

Currently I do not have a permanent position yet in my company. However, just a few weeks ago my Senior Manager told me that there is an opportunity for me in Melaka, at the Re-Gas Terminal which will start commissioning middle of next year. It is an excellent opportunity for me to accelerate my career, because I will be taking up the position as an Electrical Engineer with less competition and more time for me to master the skills I'm required to have good knowledge on.

I thought I hated Kerteh and this part of the world, but my heavy heart weighed itself on Amin. Near to each other, we do things that make me forget my misery living so far apart from my family. Amin has helped me so much to get through, especially the last few months.

I have a fear that eventually distance would maim this relationship and fade the sparks away. I loved the times when I had meals with him, watched movies whenever we want to and go out of town once in a while. I'm afraid that all those memories will be left behind and would be buried along with my departure from this place.

He told me that he's happy that I'm getting the right momentum for my career. I know that deep down he feels just the way that I do, he's also afraid that things would fall apart if we live far from each other. We both understand that this is a time not for me to think about the relationship, but towards my career development. I'm glad he understands that. But as of right now I'm jittery and have not gotten the best signal out of his heart. I'm dying to know what he really feels. I'm dying to know if he'd be so lonely, he'd hook up with another awek or what. Hehe..

Day by day since my boss told me about the news (and it has been confirmed, just awaiting official letter), even though I'm very excited to continue this adventure in this company, I feel saddened. Amin and I have really been considering marriage, because we think that's the only option to keep us together for a long time. He discussed with his mom about it and when he told me that his family is already serious about this, I suddenly got cold feet... heheh. Cold feet, cold feet.. nervous tak sudah.

I'm young, but some people say it's a ripe age to be married. Although I'm excited for what's to come in my life, it is such a scary experience! Because of that fear of not knowing what's going to happen. Albeit a challenging life, Alhamdulillah, Allah has granted me strength and good companionionship & support through my friends and family.

Please pray for my success in my upcoming adventures.. a new career, a new workplace, a new phase of life..