Friend Anonymous

These days it's not about how much friends I can get, but what I reap from my relationships with other people. I have become selfish as I grew up to have learned what's best for myself. Therefore, everything I do, there must be a center of attention that I focus on, which is me, myself and I. Is that being selfish? Or is it a natural self-defense attitude?

I must admit it that I have a frail heart to begin with. It breaks so easily for other people, like I'm carrying a timebomb that is meant to blow off at their end but I take the fear of hearing the ticker and anticipating the explosion, for them instead. Sometimes my outer appearance may be just a stage play I put to make myself more 'sociable', as a human being. 

I find that in life there must be a bunch of people who makes a certain part of your life feel different. IMO, what connects one human to another is what they get in return for being 'sociable', not how much we know about each other. What we get in return for having a connection with other people can be in the form of tangible and intangible things. In the end, it's the emotional effect is the impact we remember the most, that we yearn for the most. It's like asking: Do these people make me happy or miserable? What lesson did they taught me? Did they make me happier by helping me to escape trouble?

I'd like to believe that I don't have to disclose so much information of myself to make anyone happy. Being with one another for more than 24 hours should make it enough to break the ice, but it's the results that matter, that is: what I can do for them, how they make me feel, or how happy and memorable the moments I give them. Again, it's not the duration of time but the significant moments. I don't know about the life of most of my friends and I just couldn't care less about what they have or what they don't. 

Well that's my concept.

Please don't put your face in your hands, we can be friends.